Add to that my blocks and problems with Chrysalis. I love writing so much, even when I'm working of things that have very little to do with my professional goals, but the tagline and subsequent query haunt me like a specter from Ghost Hunt. Before I put the Tagline workshop up on Saturday, I'd made very valiant attempts to tag Chrysalis.
Every time I ran into proverbial walls. I listed those four things over and over. I couldn't figure out a pithy way to explain the plot. Raquel wanted to grow up. Raquel wanted friends. Raquel wanted freedom. Raquel wanted so many things. She had to overcome falling off a cliff. She had to overcome a cave in. She had to overcome PTSD. She had to overcome so many things.
Or Everyone Dies.
At least I had two of the four. Raquel and Death.
Then I put up the workshop and changed the two variables. Raquel wants revenge and the boys are in the way. She wants to kill Brandon's father but Devlin is the one really deserving of revenge. After some editing and parring down, I've gone from:
Raquel just stole a Severance, the only weapon capable of destroying the monster responsible for the massacre of her people, so of course she's hiding out in high school waiting for the opportune moment for her revenge. As she discovers the truth of her past, she realizes that once more she's put everyone she loves in danger of dying.
Raquel has every intention of using her stolen weapon to take revenge on the man responsible for the massacre of her people even though her path puts everyone she loves at risk of death.
It's not perfect and still very unwieldy
And that feels good.